Begin Understanding and Healing

Abuse is spiteful and degrading...   no one deserves it.

Abuse devastates body, mind and spirit no matter whether the target of the abuser is male or female; no matter whether the type of abuse is physical, mental, emotional, spiritual or financial.

There are no differences among the broken hearts and wounded souls of all.

What is different, however, are the familial, social, and lawful reactions to the gender of the battered person and how each live, cope, survive and thrive. Battered men do react differently and are treated differently by society than are battered women. The opposite is also true.

Are you here because you are being abused?  Do you think you might be, but aren't sure?  Is someone you know in an abusive relationship and you want to help?

Are you planning to leave or want to leave an abusive relationship and you need support?  Do you want to leave but you are afraid or don't know how to go about it?

Are you here because you have recently ended an abusive relationship and you need to understand what happened to you, how it happened, why it happened and how you can best reclaim your life?

Welcome to Heart 2 Heart. A kind and loving resource for abused men. A place to begin understanding and healing, all in complete privacy... all in your own time. A safe, quiet place to find answers.

Inside this Site:

  Are you being abused?

- Abusive behavior list
- Destruction of property & pets
- How does your partner treat you?
- How do you feel about your partner?


  Getting Past Justifying Abuse

- Abuse rationalization & minimization list
- Helping a friend or family member
- Abuse lethality guide


  Abusive Brainwashing Techniques

- How did this happen to me?
- Biderman's Chart of Coercion
- Abusive breakdown tactics


  Why do we stay?

- Why do battered men remain silent?
- About fear of leaving
- Why don't battered men seek help?
- Men Don't Tell by David L. Fontes, Psy.D.
- Working through Battered Men's Syndrome


  The Cycle of Abuse

- About the Cycle of Abuse
- Diagram of the Cycle of Abuse
- How the Cycle of Abuse affects you
- Are you addicted to drama?


  Abused Men Speak Out

- True life battered men experiences
- Email excepts from abused men
- Anonymous letters from abused men


  You and Abuse

- Has abuse changed you?
- How have you changed?
- How do we cope with abuse?


  Inside the Abusive Mind

- Who are abusive people?
- List of behaviors and thinking patterns
- Profiling abusers


  Your Relationship Rights

- Listing of your relationship rights
- Is your relationship loving or abusive?
- Should you change for your partner?


  Co-Dependency

- What is co-dependency?
- Are you co-dependent?


  Deciding to Leave

- Safety first
- Thinking ahead and preparing
- After you go
- Thoughts for perspective


  Learning to Take Care of Yourself

- Assertive behavior
- Assertive Bill of Rights
- Local support groups & resources suggestions


- World-wide websites & helplines

  The Self-Esteem Factor

- Symptoms of low self-esteem
- Building self-esteem
- 10 Commandments of Self-Esteem


  Setting Personal Boundaries

- What are personal boundaries?
- Making choices and self-empowerment
- Becoming a friend to yourself
- Setting your boundaries
- Your basic rights


  What About Help for Your Partner?

- Batterer's programs?
- Marriage counselling?
- Abusers and alcohol and drugs


  Making Legal Decisions

- Finding legal help
- Choosing a lawyer
- Making decisions you can live with


  Relationship Warning Signs

- Beginning a new relationship
- Abusive relationship warning signs
- Signs to look for in an abusive personality
- Traits and characteristics of violent offenders


  Ultra-Sensitive People

- Who is an ultra-sensitive person?
- Are you ultra-sensitive?
- US men in abusive relationships


  Battered Men

- Secret Side To Domestic Violence
- an excellent article by Keith Thompson


  Borderline Personality Disorder

- BDP FAQs
- Indicators of BDP
- Additional Common BP Traits
- BP and Non-BP "Games"
- Link to BDP Central


  Heart 2 Heart Bibliography

- Resources and acknowledgments
- Internet sites accessed
** Reproducing or linking this site

  In Defence of Sensitivity

- A beautiful piece about sensitivity by Maia


  My Heart 2 Your Heart

- An inspiring note to help you fly
- from the author of Heart 2 Heart


  Heart 2 Heart InterActive

- An adult community forum offering understanding, discussion, support, resources, hugs and smiles. Open to men, women, friends and family members.


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